If you’re a blogger, you’ll get this post. If you’re not, it may be hard for you to understand just how much the blogging life resembles online dating.
It’s hard to compare my friendships with real life people to my blogging friends. My real life friends come with a long history. They know me well. They know my past. They laugh at my jokes even when they’re not funny. They know my family. Their husbands are friends with my husband; their kids, friends with mine. They get me.
But there’s a huge part of my life that my real life friends don’t get, despite my best efforts to try to explain it. Blogging, and all that comes with it, becomes complicated to explain to those not involved. And at the end of the day we only have so much time to chat that I tend to leave out the not so important stuff.
The more I interact with my blogging friends, the more I turn to them in times of need. Connections are created everyday and since we are all social media gurus you know you’re guaranteed to find a friend online at any given time of the day. They’re always there for you.
BUILDING THE RELATIONSHIP
First it starts out by following each other on Twitter; chatting about common interests, blogging advice and so on. Then, if all goes well you ‘friend’ each other on Facebook. Now you know you’ve become more serious. You get a more intimate look at one another’s life. Maybe you get to see pictures of their kids, their husbands and their real life friends.
Next you’ll start chatting about your day, your job, your in-laws and your husband. But you know it’s gone to the next level when you go to them for some serious advice about serious matters and they actually help you. Provide a solution to your problem or at the very least make you feel better because they’ve provided you a shoulder to cry on.
So far it’s remained pretty anonymous. Sure you’re friends on Facebook, you’re in each other’s Circles and you’ve given each other Klout but it hasn’t crossed over yet to the real big stuff. It’s not totally serious until you exchange numbers. This is a big step. You don’t give out your cell phone number to just anyone right?
Now you have instant access to one another any place, any time with no dependency on the Internet. You text each other for the first time and then again a few days later (because you don’t want to seem too eager) and before you know it, their name always appears at the top of your messages window. Guess what, you’re in a relationship!
THE ONLINE RELATIONSHIP
Don’t forget that at this point you still have not met each other in real life. You know their middle name, the school they went to and the ages and birth dates of all their children, but you have not met face-to-face. You’ve now Stumbled each other more than you can remember and you’ve contributed to lowering their Alexa rank but you couldn’t necessarily pick them out of a crowd.
THE FIRST DATE
Whether it’s a planned meeting or a chance encounter, the first date is always the most exciting. It doesn’t matter whether the first meeting happens on a group date like at a blogging conference or if it’s a run in at the local grocery store. Putting a face to this online name means never turning back.
How do you greet her for the first time? Do you shake hands or is that too formal considering the relationship you’ve built. Do you hug her; after all you’ve developed strong feelings for her over the past few months. But will that scare her off?
Now that you’ve met and you’ve put a face to the name and the anticipation is over what happens next? Are you friends for life? Do you plan your next get together? Where does it go from here? Is she as into you as you are to her? I guess only time will tell.
This post is dedicated to my first date, Amanda from Multi-Testing Mommy. She has so graciously allowed me to share a picture from our first meeting and this (posting a pic) is a big deal for her! My friendship with Amanda inspired this post and though we don’t live in the same city, she’s got a friend for life in me. And yes, she lived up to and exceeded my expectations!
City Mom & Multi-Testing Mommy
And to all my blogging friends (you know who you are) thanks for always being there and for sharing this journey with me!
Image: Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net